Thoughts On Thanksgiving and Black Friday

In context of historical punctuation (being that of an exclamation point (should be a question mark)) what transpired in Plymouth during the 1600s is akin to a blood orgy. Thus it seems appropriate to celebrate genocide by plucking turkeys naked and massacring them in grandiose figures. But like a true capitalist nation we’ve marketed thanks & praise through dollars & cents. Censoring the following Friday with enough black the entire spectrum of corporate splendor follows suit. Consumers navigate a maze of sweating beasts clawing their fellow humans aside to reach that top-shelf object, which gives them meaning, gives the market meaning, and keeps the proletariat employed for another year. Historians will view footage of the Black Fridays of yore and will consult with anthropologists to better understand the mob mentality on screen. I suspect the term human nature will be tossed around like a wild animal’s head suffering from delusional parasitosis. The final conclusion will be an agreement of thanks that they weren’t there to experience such a phenomenon. But in the presence of now I am thankful that such a day is approaching and until the need for darkness subsides I’ll spend my Fridays in the sunshine.

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